the first thing aaron said to me was: “i’ve seen you here before.”
it wasn’t a pickup line, he would later explain. he really had seen me waiting for the train a few nights prior. we started talking, and it was like we had been talking for years, had met each other in a dozen different train stations from a dozen different lifetimes. you know that bullshit about soul mates? you meet someone and instantly feel this deep, intense connection, as though you knew them in a past life. when i met him, it wasn’t a deep, intense connection i felt. it was something more like relief; silent wonder. it came in small waves, like the first time you take in the view after hiking up a mountain.
we were broken up for almost a year. i was living in my old apartment on mccoppin street when he decided he’d had enough, and he left. after a few minutes, i stood up - very calmly and without much effort - and logged into my facebook. a strange sense of indignation and shame came over me. this is what my life has come to. my boyfriend just broke up with me, and i’m logging into facebook to change my relationship status.
after scrolling down to choose the ‘single’ option, i decided to erase it from my page entirely to write a summary of my current situation in the form of a status update. you know, because people care about that sort of thing:
"moving on. someone send me a bottle of patron and a really hot rebound."
jennifer ng and john clement bollozos both ‘liked’ it. brian bizier claimed that he wanted “to make a basketball joke right now, but nothing [was] coming.” daniel jakoubek replied: “that’s what she said?”
recently, the washington post did an interview with david sedaris. he was talking about his boyfriend of 23 years, and how you should always marry your conscious. “Hugh is a really decent person in ways that can be really, really irritating. I’m grateful for it though, because Hugh’s not the kind of person who would say ‘Oh, it’s OK to cheat’ or ‘Everybody steals a little something sometimes’ or ‘So what if you hurt that person’s feelings? They had it coming.’”
here’s the thing: aaron is a much better person than i am, which is irritating. he is more rational, communicative, and has a nicer jawline. and he always says what he means. a few months into our relationship, he said: “i want to be with you for a long time.” how was i supposed to know he actually meant it, and wasn’t just trying to seduce me? i like the idea of being with someone who is both logical by nature, yet pregnant with emotion. it’s like i’m marrying spock, literally and figuratively, because my betrothed and the actor zachary quinto have similar facial features that i’m okay with.
anyway, i don’t think that i really believe in soul mates. but if you told me that you did, i wouldn’t blame you.
"do you want me to make you some tea?"
"no, i want you to make me some beer."